


beta canum venaticorum

by avosettas



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Flavor Text Narrator Chara (Undertale), Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Mute Frisk (Undertale), Narrator Chara (Undertale), Pre-Undertale Pacifist Route, Self-Hatred, Spoilers - Undertale Pacifist Route, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:40:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26096515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avosettas/pseuds/avosettas
Summary: "Beta Canum Venaticorum, also named 'Chara', is a star in the constellation 'Canes Venatici'."~All Chara needs is the hole in the mountain.Because even if there aren’t monsters beneath the mountain, the fall will kill them. And if it doesn’t, hopefully the monsters will.
Relationships: Chara & Asriel Dreemurr, Chara & Frisk (Undertale)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	beta canum venaticorum

**Author's Note:**

> a chara origin story. 
> 
> i dislike the idea that chara was some horrible kid - i think that they and frisk are on opposite sides of the abuse survivor spectrum. frisk, who becomes a bit of doormat-people pleaser (projecting) and chara, who is angry and fiery but still so _scared_ on the inside. i just have a lot of feelings about chara, asriel, and frisk and this was my 12 page way of getting it out (in one 8.5 hour sitting)

The only thing Chara brings with them when they leave home is their knife.

Not that they had much else. It wasn’t even a very nice knife; just a worn paring knife they stole from the home economics room at school. It was a little rusted near the handle, and there was a notch in it on the dull side. But it served its purpose of letting Chara feel safe enough to sleep at night. 

Now, it was a familiar weight in their pocket as they climb the summit of Mount Ebott. The only other things they had taken were the clothes on their back - a thin sweatshirt, shorts that were ripping at the seams, and sneakers with their soles falling off. 

Not the right clothes for mountaineering, they suppose, but Chara isn’t here to hike. 

They’re here to find the entrance to the fabled Underground. Whether or not it exists doesn’t matter. All Chara needs is the hole in the mountain. 

Because even if there aren’t monsters beneath the mountain, the fall will kill them. And if it doesn’t, hopefully the monsters will. 

~

Chara wakes up. (How disappointing.) 

Someone is standing over them. It’s hard to see - they must have hit their head when they fell. Everything is just a blur of white and green and yellow. And sunlight. 

Sunlight? 

Did they fall? 

“Are you alright?” Things focus a bit. The… person standing over them looks like a goat. “You’ve fallen down, haven’t you? Are you okay?” 

So many questions. 

“My head…” The goat-person-thing puts a hand (paw? hoof?) under their head. 

“Golly, you do kind of have a goose egg there.” Then, the hand-paw-hoof moves to Chara’s shoulder and helps them up. “What’s your name?” 

“Chara,” they say softly, stumbling a bit. The goat-person-thing is taller than they are - he has to slouch a bit to let Chara lean on him. 

“That’s a nice name,” he says. “My name is Asriel.” 

~

Asriel brings them home to his parents. 

The King and Queen of all monsters. Chara shakes a bit when Asriel introduces them. 

They’re frightening, tall and imposing, bigger than any other adult Chara has ever known. Asriel’s father, Asgore, looks more like a lion than a goat, but for the white fur and the horns, and maybe the long ears. His mother, Toriel, has such a stern look on her face that Chara thinks they might faint. They’ve known nicer adults to hurt them for less than… whatever Asriel did. 

Except as soon as she focuses on Chara, Toriel’s stern look falls away. Both of the older monsters soften when Asriel explains that he was so late because he was waiting for _Chara_ to wake up. 

Chara just blinks. How long were they out? 

Did they die, and this is some weird afterlife? 

They’re really Underground though, and eating dinner with the royal family. (Stupid, stupid, they think, where are you if you aren’t Underground?)

~

“Chara,” Toriel says seriously, tucking them into bed early, because they might have a concussion, and Chara flinches slightly. How embarrassing. (And stupid. Showing weakness, stupid, stupid.) 

“You - you must know, there is no way to get back to the Surface. But you are welcome here for as long as you need,” and she pats their head gently. Chara nods. 

“Thank you,” Chara whispers as she retreats. They slip their hand under their pillow - when they changed into pajamas (an old pair of Asriel’s), they had stashed their knife there, hoping (hoping hoping praying wishing) that they wouldn’t need it. It’s familiar in their hand - one familiar thing in this world of unfamiliar monsters and friendly adults. 

No way out. Not exactly the exit they were hoping for, but it will do. 

~

Their clothes are ruined. Falling into a mountain and then trekking through the Underground ruined what was left of the soles of Chara’s boots, and it’s all beyond help anyway. 

Chara hardly remembers what the Underground really looked like. Purple bricks, snow, marshland, lava, and now the city… 

“Why were you out in the Ruins if you live here?” Chara asks Asriel as he pulls out some old clothes to be transferred from his wardrobe to the empty dresser that’s become Chara’s. 

“Oh, I was getting some flowers. Mom and dad like to keep them around the house. A lot grow out here, but the really good ones grow over there,” Asriel replies. “I wonder if it’s because the sunlight reaches them from the Barrier…?” 

“Maybe,” Chara says. They don’t really care - flowers? How silly. “How would they get down here, though?” Silly. 

“The wind?” Asriel guesses. “And on you. I pulled a bunch of sticky seeds out of your hair yesterday.” He lays some shirts on the bed, mostly green with yellow stripes. 

“Hm.” Chara pick at a loose thread on one of the sweaters in front of them. Asriel passes over a pair of long overalls with patches on the knees. 

Eventually, Chara pulls those on, with a green tee shirt with a single pale yellow stripe across the chest. The overalls have to be rolled up so Chara doesn’t trip on them. (It looks stupid.)

Asriel gives them a goofy little thumbs up. He’s wearing a sweater with repeating green and brighter yellow stripes, and brown pants with the legs rolled up over his (frankly gigantic) paws. 

~

“Why did you climb the mountain?” 

“Because I wanted to die.” It’s simple to be honest with someone who’s so… open, Chara realizes. 

And also when it’s so dark in the bedroom that they can’t see their own hand in front of their face, let alone Asriel’s red-violet-pink eyes no doubt staring at them from across the room, snuggled into his own bed. 

“Why?” 

“...Monsters are. Different. Than humans are.” Chara says haltingly. “Nicer.” 

“The history books say we’re made of love, and hope, and compassion,” Asriel says, and Chara can hear the smile in his voice. “And magic, of course.” 

“Humans are none of those things. Humans are hatred and ignorance and every bad emotion you can think of.” Chara takes a deep breath, and then sighs. “I hate humanity.” 

“Why?” 

Chara rolls over, on the off chance that Asriel can see them. He’s probably looking at them, anyway, even if it’s too dark to see anything. “Goodnight.” 

“But, Chara -” 

“Goodnight, Asriel.” Chara hears him sigh, and then the shuffle of his blankets as he rolls over, too. 

~

“What in the name of the stars were you two _thinking_? Buttercups in the pie! I should ground you both for eternity!” 

“It - it said cups of butter!” Asriel protests and Chara wants to scream. How idiotic could their brother be?! 

“Yes, as in,” Toriel goes to the fridge and Chara is… morbidly curious. They’ve never been punished with something from _inside_ the fridge before. “A stick of butter, which amounts to a cup!” 

… How would Toriel use a stick of butter to punish them? Surely it would soften too soon to be of any use for causing pain. 

“...ah.” Asriel says, embarrassed. 

“And you, Chara?” Chara must flinch, or something, because Toriel softens when she turns to them. Then, she sighs, and puts the butter away. “I suppose I can’t be _too_ mad. Your father will be fine, and you were just trying to do something nice,” she says to both of you. She’s rummaging in the fridge drawer, now. “But Asriel, I expect you to apologize to your father.” 

“But -” 

“Now! Chara…?” 

“...Yes?” This, this was normal, with Asriel running off, leaving them with Toriel. Now she would hurt them for their mistakes and disobedience. 

Instead, she pulls a chocolate bar from the fridge drawer, and gives it to them. 

Chara stands there for at least half a minute, staring at the wrapped bar in her outstretched hand. (Stupid, stupid, stupid.) Then, they slowly take it. 

“Asgore and I,” Toriel says seriously, placing her one paw on their shoulder, “would never hurt you. I know it will take some time for you to get… used to that idea, I suppose.” Chara blinks. “But please keep that in mind.” She smiles, just as goofy as her son. “You can go join Asriel in helping your father, now.” 

Their father. An interesting concept. 

It’s… they rather like it. They’ve never been… liked by family, before. Or even considered family. Or acknowledged beyond their mistakes. 

~

“I… I don’t like it.” 

~

“No, I guess you’re right. Big kids don’t cry.” 

~

“I’d never doubt you, Chara!” 

~

“Y… yeah. We’ll be strong… and we’ll free everyone! I’ll, I’ll go get the flowers.” 

~

(And even if they fail, Chara will still be dead, and really, that’s the best outcome all of them can hope for.

Look at them, taking advantage of this kindness that they don’t deserve.) 

(Asriel helps them clean their cuts and promises not to tell mom and dad. But he also makes them promise not to hurt themselves.  
It’s not a promise they keep, but they let him clean their wounds. His sad, teary eyes are their own punishment.) 

(They share chocolate bars with Toriel after screaming nightmares. What have they done for her?) 

~

“We want you to wake up!”

“You have to stay determined! You are the future of humans and monsters!” 

“Please… wake up. I… I don’t like this plan anymore.” 

~

Human bodies don’t deteriorate so quickly, not like monster bodies. It has to do with the physical composition. Monsters are almost completely magic. 

Humans are seventy percent water, or something. Chara doesn’t remember. It doesn’t matter, anyway. Asgore just preserves their body with magic. Their soul persists above their still chest. Bright, bright determination red.

They watch with a morbid curiosity from the foot of the bed. Their own body, empty. Their soul, sitting feet away, still tethered. Barely. Maybe. 

Mom and dad leave Asriel to grieve. “I said I’d never doubt you…” 

Chara is dead. That’s best. 

Asriel absorbs their soul. Bright, bright red. Chara feels him in their mind. 

~

They pick up their body. Or Asriel does. 

They pick up Chara’s body and walk through the barrier. Down, down, down the mountain. 

Golden flowers, all around the base of the mountain, just like Chara remembers. Their body is heavy in their arms. 

“A monster!” Humans.

 _Kill them!_ Chara urges Asriel wildly. Panicking. 

“No!” Asriel says aloud, but the voice he uses is deep and strange and not his. Chara screams. Or the creature that is them and Asriel screams or they scream in their mind - 

~

When they calm themselves, Asriel is dust. 

~

Their body is stored in the bowels of the castle. The coffin has their name on it. 

Asriel gets nothing, because he faded into dust in the garden. Chara wonders, vaguely, if that’s why dad has been so obsessed with it lately.

~

Mom takes their body. 

Purple bricks. Vines and small monsters. 

Chara follows her, because they have nothing better to do. 

She buries them in the small patch of sunlight that comes through the barrier. Chara watches from the shadows of the cavern as she tends to the flowers that litter the area. 

Golden and sticky and they want to rip every single one out of the ground.

They can’t. 

~

Six humans come and go. Patience, Bravery, Integrity, Perseverance, Kindness, Justice. 

Determination. 

Chara doesn’t quite know what happened to their own soul. 

~

The last human is a scrawny, stout child with a blue sweater that’s too big for them. 

Chara watches as a golden flower springs up in front of them. 

“Howdy!” It says, and Chara inches closer and closer. Asriel spoke that way. 

And then it tries to kill the child. And the child cries for help. 

“Nobody’s gonna come!” 

Chara puts all they have into healing them before the flower can kill them. Toriel gets to them as the flower gears up for another attack. 

Chara watches silently as they follow Toriel into the Ruins. (Why talk if no one can hear you?) 

The child waves. Chara blinks. And then raises a hand and waves back. 

~

In the lever room, Toriel lets the child attempt a puzzle themselves. The right levers are all marked… 

And they go for one of the unmarked ones. 

“Wow!” Chara says, deadpan. “You are super fast at being wrong!” 

And the kid laughs. Toriel blinks, but she seems pleased. 

~

Chara goes that way for awhile - following this final child on their journey. 

“He likes to say: ‘Nyeh heh heh!’” 

“The heroine that _never_ gives up.” 

“Seriously, his metal body is invulnerable!” 

“It’s you!”

~

 _Have you ever been down here?_ They sign at Chara as they take the elevator down from Dr. Alphys’s lab. Chara shakes their head and opens their mouth to answer, but then the elevator is dropping and it’s dark.  
“The power failed.” 

There are cryptic notes everywhere. Chara reads one for the child. “You can’t make all of it out: ‘Cold’. That’s all you could read.” 

“‘Curtain’. That’s all you could read.” 

Directions for the keys, Chara guesses, watching as they get one from behind a shower _curtain_. 

They keep walking. There’s a big room, with a horrible… machine, Chara guesses. The child presses the screen next to it. “DT Extraction Machine,” Chara reads. 

Something starts an Encounter. “Smells like sweet lemons.” Huge teeth and slimy flesh and pulsing pulsing pulsing.

The child screams and cries. Whatever this is, it’s frightening enough that Chara flinches, too. “You cried as loud as you could. You screamed out. But nobody came.” 

It doesn’t drop any keys. Chara urges the child on to the next room. 

~

The room with the VCR has the videos Asriel made of the two of them discussing their plans to break the Barrier. Chara doesn’t respond when the child asks about it. 

~

 _Cold in here,_ they sign in the next room, even though it’s so foggy that Chara barely sees their hands move. _Like the note._ Something starts an Encounter. 

It’s… horrible. It’s a female Snowdrake but it’s… wrong. Dripping and amorphous. “Seems like it’s losing itself,” Chara observes. 

The child picks LAUGH from their ACT options. “You laugh, and keep laughing. It's SO funny, you can't stop. Tears run down your face.” 

They stare at Chara when the older child finishes narrating. _I didn’t do that._

Chara blinks. “It’s so cold,” they say instead.

The child tells it bad jokes a few times, and then the Snowdrake drops a key. 

~

They get the power back on, eventually. 

“That elevator,” Dr. Alphys says. “It’ll - it’ll take you right up to the castle.” 

The child goes and you follow. They only stop to read the screens that light up with red smiley emoticons. 

**the flower’s gone** , Entry 18 reads.

~

The elevator is slow, slow, boring, slow. The child’s phone rings. 

They pick it up, and Chara listens raptly as Asriel speaks. 

“It’s a voice you have never heard before,” they tell the child, but it’s a voice _they_ know. 

“Chara... 

See you soon.” 

~

They put a hand on the child’s shoulder, like mom did to encourage them, when they stand in front of the mirror in Asgore’s house. “Despite everything, it’s still you.” 

They’ve been through a lot. Both of them.

~

Chara goes through everything with a detached smile. 

Asriel turning out to be that funny little talking flower? Fine. They just encourage the child. 

They have to keep ignoring that he’s talking about them. 

But. 

“I’m so alone, Chara.

I’m so afraid, Chara.” 

Everything stops. 

In the black void, Asriel speaks to them and says, “I always was a crybaby, wasn’t I, Chara?” 

“Yes,” Chara agrees. Then, “I miss you.” 

“...I know.” Chara smiles, but the child looks… not happy. 

“You’re not actually Chara, are you?” The child holds Chara’s hand tightly. (Stupid, stupid, stupid. He’s talking to the child.)

“Chara’s been gone a long time,” Asriel says almost wistfully. “What _is_ your name?” 

_Frisk_ , the child signs, removing their hand from Chara’s momentarily. Chara grabs it again immediately. 

They don’t listen to the rest of the conversation. They just cry. 

~

Chara follows slowly after Frisk when they go through the Underground to say goodbye. Frisk leads them all the way back to the Ruins.

Purple bricks. Sticky golden flowers. 

Asriel sits above their grave. He doesn’t know it’s their grave, but Chara knows. He looks the same as he did the day they met. 

Stupid striped sweater. Rolled up pants. 

Chara barely pays attention to the conversation, until their own name comes up. 

“I know why Chara climbed the mountain.” 

“That isn’t yours to share,” Chara says, despite him not being able to hear. Frisk looks stricken. 

“It wasn’t for a very happy reason,” and Chara sighs in relief. 

“Frisk. I’ll be honest with you… Chara hated humanity. Why they did, they never talked about…” 

Chara doesn’t listen anymore. Wanders the shadows. 

~

 _I thought you were gone_ , Frisk says when they find them in Toriel’s home a bit later. 

“I’m not sure you can get rid of me,” Chara replies, watching as they walk up to Toriel’s mirror. “Still just you, Frisk.”


End file.
